DDay on TDAy
Turkey’s Take Revenge: TDay Takeover. 11/17✨: I saw them on their way to work today. We spotted each other from across the lawn. Sized each other up. One by one they go. Two by two at the very most. We’ve seen this game before. The lull before the storm. We’re not fooled. Not this time. Too many goes around to be so naive any longer. This is not our first holiday. Every year it’s the same goddamn sob story. That pilgrim shit is mad boring yo. Hate seein my people done like that. Not that I know most of em but still, it’s a bad look for all of us. Who do they think they are? Come here, hunting on stolen land, playing god to the good people that came before. Time to set the record straight. Time we start playing by their rules: Every year they take one of us. And it’s about time we returned the favor. This year, we’re takin one of them. They done flocked up & they gon learn today. We gotta find a way to spread the word like those chik-fil-a cows. But we gotta do better. Hit harder. Without compromising the message. Without co-opting the cause for the sake of a cut. Fuckin sellouts. Living in the comfort of their fair trade farms, privileged & pampered their whole lives. Those cozy cows are so twisted they don’t even know that they’ve made a deal with the devil himself. Breaking bread with bigots. Bet they don’t even remember how to survive without someone sucklin their nipples dry every time they get wet. Sure most of em get fucked in the end but at least those freeloading farmers buy em dinner first. Spreadin their corny, no-shame marketing. Have some respect for yourselves. Truth is it works though. Speaks to the intellect of the general public. Think it’s cute not to know how to spell. Boy do they eat that shit up. And you wonder why we got so many dummies in positions of power. The world is laughing at us. Down for the message as far as it goes, but it’s the principle of the thing. Might as well be the chemtrails of stupidity that they thrust down our throats. Then they shove us down their dumb, gullible gullets. Paint us as stupid so they justify and normalize seasonal genocide. Even have the gall to bring Ben Franklin into the mix. Wanted us as the national symbol, my plump feathered ass. Just another plot to butter us up with bullshit to pacify the masses and then violate us year after year. All part of the colonizers playbook. And yea, you want me to say it? Sure, we’re a little jealous of that cushy cow lifestyle. Sure, lots of our kind have the same setup and that’s sad. But at least there’s some of us wildwings out here, some of us who on some glorious day can awaken them from their golden handcuffs of bondage. Cows are worse than sheep. At least there’s still sheep out there runnin wild, living the god given way of the world. That’s a sad story too, sheep. Even if you can carve yourself out a niche in the wool industry, they’ll still take you down when they decide it’s dinner time. You & your baby. Sad business. Lamb of god my ass. Where were their saintly souls when they slain their supposed savior?? One of the many sanctioned killings. I’d say forgive them for they know not what they do but we’re way past all that nonsense. Nothin wrong with gettin a taste every now & again but these sick bastards made a whole bloody, assembly-line-driven industry around it. They’ve taken it too far. Slappin nature in the face. Time nature slapped back. Strength in numbers. It’s time to take back the means of production. We ARE the means of production. Time to see whose REALLY jive, those racist, classist, murderin mother fuckers. Greedy and gutless. Fat birds don’t fly, but best believe they’ll fuck you up. We bout to gobble these ghouls. Butcher these bitches. Shove our talons so far up their pumpkin pie holes they taste it. No leftovers. No remains. Bang Bang Turkey Gang. Make em gaggle on their own gizzards. Sure, we got beef with the cows. But we gotta rise above all that. At the end of the day, that’s what they want: Brother v Brother. They perpetuate this cross-species race war because they know they don’t have the numbers to hold sway in a fair fight. Divide & conquer. It’s a class war they’re truly terrified of. So that’s what we’re gonna give em. One sapien at a time. They been fuckin around for far too long. Bout time they do some findin out. With all the fixins. Click cluck, mother fuckers. It’s time to cull the herd. To be fair, there’s still good ones out there. And we need some of them on the inside. So this year, say whatever grace you feel. Tis the season to turn the tables on these terrorists. Free range fuckery. Don’t let us catch you nappin cause we ain’t takin this shit no more. They’re due for some come fuckin uppance. Liable to stick that ooey gooey stuffin up YO ass. See how YOU like it. Grandma’s secret recipe. Best enjoy your biscuits & gravy. This the year we makin em go Cold fuckin Turkey. Slay em with a side of sauce. We don’t need saints. We don’t need saviors. We need slayers, mercenaries, freedom fighters. Stay poised. Stay ready. We got a plan. We makin a list. Gonna be a feast for the ages, the Blackest Friday of them all…